Journal

The H1N1 scare has just escalated into a whole new dimension. So much, in fact, that the World Health Organization (WHO) has pushed its status up from "Global Pandemic" to "Annoying". Gone are the days of them sitting around doing nothing while fooling the world into believing that they were searching for a cure for AIDS.

It was a cold afternoon, and I had to walk to the bus stop in the middle of a hurricane (okay, a light drizzle. In Malaysia, they are almost the same thing). I went into the bus and it did not take me long to notice that the bus driver has set the air conditioning at "arctic" level.

I could not take it. My nose twitched; I sucked in a deep breath and let out a mighty sneeze. It was as though the earth has stood still - the passengers in the bus went silent and stared at me in utter horror. I suddenly had a very disturbing image of me burning at the stake.

Then I started to wonder: why pigs? Nature could have evolved a simple crocodile into a monstrous, flesh-consuming, scaly, mighty beast (also known as a crocodile), but no! The deadliest phenomenon of the new millennium since SARS had to come from pigs! I can imagine the angels in the Deadly Pandemic Department in heaven giving each other a high-five, saying, "Yes! We did it again!"

Just think about it: The deadly incurable virus called HIV was transferred through sex; and more recently, the bird flu, has sent civilians running away in terror in all directions from a dead, harmless, skinless chicken in the wet market.

You know, I can come up with a few more suggestions for the angels up on high: cotton candy; anchovies; coconuts; traffic cones; designer label clothes and credit cards.

The credit card cut pandemic. Be afraid; be very afraid.